Alexandra came out of reception today with chocolate smudged on her face and a ripped open package of Maltesers in her hand. Half were still stuffed in her cheek, bulging like a hamster.
Who's birthday was it today? I asked knowingly.
I'll give you a hint. It starts with a wah, she said slipping her slightly sticky hand into mine.
William?
So, the snow of last week is but a distant memory, and even though the weatherman is teasing me with the faint possibility that we might have more later today, I know it won't be anything like that last lot. Am I alone in feeling just the slightest bit sad about that?
It's not like I enjoy being cold or anything. I hate being wet. And I detest driving on snow. In fact, more of a 'city' city-dweller than me, it would be hard to find. But there was something about last week's snow that took me past that 'oooh, it's cold and wet, let's stay inside with hot chocolate and old movies' zone.
A friend gave me a copy of this before my children were born – it still makes me cry with laughter four years on – here’s a bit of it:
Preparing for a child to come into your home is not just a matter of reading Sheila Kitzinger and decorating the nursery. Here are some simple tests for expectant parents to take to prepare themselves for the real life experience:
1. To discover how nights feel, walk around the living room from 5pm to 10pm carrying a wet bag weighing approximately 8-12 lbs. (For twins carry two bags). At 10pm put the bag down, set the alarm for 12am and go to sleep. Get up at 12 and walk the living room floor with the bag until 1am. Put the alarm on for 3am. As you can’t get back to sleep, get up at 2am and get a drink. Go to bed at 2.45am. Get up at 3am when the alarm goes off. Sing songs in the dark until 4am. Put the alarm on for 5am. Get up, make breakfast. Keep this up for 5 years. Look cheerful.
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